Woe is me.

I’m having a pity party for myself tonight.

Lately I’ve been realizing more and more that my family really doesn’t know, or want to, know me.

It’s not for lack of trying. I’ve tried to involve them in my life. I’ve tried to share with them my perspectives, my points of view, my thoughts. I’ve really, genuinely tried over the years. I just don’t think they care. So long as I am there, so long as I can pick up their kids when needed, wash the dishes after thanksgiving dinner, so long as I can help with the upkeep of the family, then I’m serving my purpose.

Which kind of leads me to wonder…. what would happen if I just stopped? Would I ever hear from my family at all? Would they reach out just to say hello? Would they even care? Honestly, I don’t know that I’d hear from them at all.

So long as I’m just there… they accept that I’m there. I think they’d just move on with their lives if I just… moved. I think they’d just honestly forget to talk to me at all…